I have just remembered I have this blog, and since I am doing writing stuff, maybe I can document some of it here.
A close friend of mine is running a non-fiction essay writing workshop Living in Language, which is very exciting to me. They are a really good teacher, which makes this even more enjoyable.
Apart from weekly readings, they also gave us our first short assignment, which is split into two parts.
First, sitting in a space and noticing the sights, smells, sounds with no storytelling or associations. Pure data collection.
Second, repeat this exercise at the same spot in a different time/ day and only this time, let your mind wander and include your thoughts, memories, associations, etc.
Ideally, this assignment would be done outdoors, but I'm lazy. So I decided to do it on a film screening day, capturing the energy of the room before and after.
BEFORE
Muffled sounds of rain interspersed with traffic and bolts of thunder. Sounds of feet shuffling against the grey-tiled floor.
An occasional "Hello, what's your name? Here's your ticket!"
The room is filled with 32 to black chairs lined in rows of 8. The projector screen is ready with the poster of the film being screened today, Oslo, 31st August.
AFTER
The energy in the room is palpable -- like we're all enveloped by the least comforting weighted blanket in the world. The air is heavy... everything is slower... sluggish even.
A sobering silence just broken by a man saying, "So what was his relationship with Iselin?" a thought that glaringly exposed the fact that he missed the point of this film by a mile.
It is painful for me to sit here and listen to this.
Each empty chair is now filled with a life -- a life that could be very different from mine. While I sit here, feeling emotionally naked, watching people try to make meaning of an experience that seems close to mine.
"The protagonist is a social misfit" -- someone just said. "Restless", "Hedonistic".*
These words sting. They are probably just well-intentioned describing words being spoken with no awareness of the latent weight they carry.
"He has a pathological defect" -- said by someone who has a rather compassionate view of this film. The phrasing still stings.
This discussion is painful to sit through.
The inherent shame of self destruction -- I feel jealous of anyone who can't relate.
Such a fun exercise... just impulsive scribbles in my notebook.